I feel like an Old Man today..

I feel so very old today. The book should have been up by now, where I was rushing up things when suddenly, something went wrong. I had ADHD, this I knew. But I guess my brain had taken the limit of its strain and it couldn't take the load anymore..crashhh..

I am now on doctor recommended tablets. More than the function of keeping me alive, they are keeping me sane. Maybe, I hope it is his 'will' that I have enough mental energy to get the KTP project to its eventual goal.

Today, I chanced to have a look by chance at some old engineering books, and I was shocked. When we read and learnt them, they were all theory. We knew nothing about the radio spectrum, 2g, EDGE, Optical communication, Frequency Modulation, White Noise, Signal to Noise Ratio , bandwidth etc..

Did anyone of us even know what was the practical value of 2 Mbps, back then ? Today's, engineering students are that mich more lucky in that sense, that they can see practically see what they learn.

Not just that. We learn a bit about computer hardware design, Economics, about Ethics. I laughed at the system back then saying what does ethics have to do with engineering?

I was a fool. Yes, today, I admit it. But although I admit I was a fool, I am not an ego headed idiot. My feet are firmly rooted in the ground. But in a sense, the KTP project touches on all these concepts at some level, radio spectrum, optical bandwidth, signal processors, multimedia codecs, operating systems. And the underlying subject about KTP is itself about Human Ethics. None of us ever saw Chernobyl, the Titanic or Mr.Peter goal, but we see piracy every day.

We all know that it is wrong at some level, yet how did society accept this phenomenon en masse, although it is morally incorrect?

Today, I realise that engineering didn't teach me engineering. It taught me about life, my future and about being human.

The original aim of the work was to make this readable and understandable for any layman. I think I will to a certain extent manage that. But I also want to add a bit of technical stuff from engineering theory and apply it to the book, but when I read one, I couldn't. My brain is already fuzzy with the drugs and I am already slower than ever. I just couldn't. At this point, I have almost reached the limit of my endurance, and atleast the first version cannot go on for ever.

I am confident that I will finish the first version, which itself will come into the public domain under Creative Commons Non commercial license, and if for some reason, I am unable to rewrite the book practically in an engineering theory context, hopefully someone else will and release it under the same Creative Commons Non Commercial license.